Life in The Avengers Household
by Ninja-on-the-run
Summary: After SHIELD places Peter Parker to live in the Avengers tower, life in the Avengers household starts to get interesting. Things get a little chaotic and somewhat strange, more than it already is. But in the end, they are all one big slightly dysfunctional happy family... Sort of. Domestic Avengers. Inspired from The Avengers Headcanons on tumblr. Pepperony. AU
1. Dismayed

**A/N: Updated version! I'd like to thank my Beta, Kat! :D If you have already read this before, not many differences. Do not fret. Only more improved and stuff. ****Tony Stark, Spider Slayer and Clint Barton, Wake Up Caller were too much fun to write. I'm just going to continue writing Avengers drabbles/one shots. Only this time, they'll all be in one fanfic. Might go till 20 chapters, I'm not sure. But this is just the first chapter so, yeah! I will provide a back story to the Tony Stark, Spider Slayer story. ********I love writing about the R&D Department so much. Because it must be really interesting working in Stark Tower. [Or Avengers Tower] **

******I'll also be posting these on my deviantart with a image to go along with it. The link to it is on my page. :3 **

**I don't own the Avengers**

* * *

"This is the kid SHIELD wants us to look after?"

"That's Spider-Man?!"

The avengers all looked at the screen. The scrawny kid from Queens, was Spider-Man?

"You're kidding."

Clint Barton wasn't sure whether to believe it or not, and he has seen many unbelievable things in his lifetime, but this one takes all of the awards.

"How old is he?" asked Natasha.

"17."

"He's still a kid!" exclaimed Pepper.

"How is this kid on the potential threat list again?" asked Bruce.

"Supposedly, he's Spider-Man."

"Jarvis, pull up Spider-Man footage from last week."

"Right away sir."

Multiple articles of Spider-Man, the crime fighter with spider like abilities appeared on the screen, blurry video clips from a street monitor camera came into view.

"Wow."

"And we're supposed to babysit him?" asked Tony.

"No, just keep him under our watch," says Steve looking from the files sent from SHIELD on the Stark Tablet.

"But we're not babysitters," said Tony, slightly annoyed.

"Tony-"

"Steve, he's a kid! Why would we want a kid around here? I'm pretty sure he's a freshman."

"He's a senior."

"Same thing. Jarvis, put Fury on the line."

"You're overreacting a bit," said Steve starting to stand up.

"Nope. I'm giving Cyclops a piece of my mind," growled Tony.

Just then, Nick Fury was on the screen.

"Stark."

"Fury, just what the hell were you thinking? A kid?!" exclaimed Tony, infuriated.

"I'd knew you'd react like this."

"Well what did you expect?" asked Tony.

"Have you even read his file?" asked Nick.

"It d doesn't matter, he's just a kid," said Tony.

"He's a straight A student, never had detention, doesn't have a criminal past. Or at least that's what SHIELD's got on him," read Clint.

"Doesn't sound like a brat to me," commented Natasha.

"But you on the other hand sound like a five year old," said Steve looking over at Tony.

"Steve, we aren't keeping the kid here. It's too dangerous," Tony looked over at Bruce. "And no, I'm not talking about the other guy."

"Then why don't you want him to stay here?" asked Pepper.

"Do I have to repeat myself? It's dangerous!"

"It can't be more dangerous than him being Spider-man. Everyone gets to votes on it. Clint?" asked Steve.

"I don't see the problem keeping him here," Clint shrugged. He was still having a tough time believing. But why not?, "He seems like a good kid."

"Natasha?" asked Steve.

"I don't mind. I agree. This could be fun."

"Bruce?" asked Steve.

"As long as he's not in the same room with the other guy," said Bruce with a small shrug.

"So, I'm the bad guy here?," Tony shook his head. "No."

"I say yes," said Steve.

"We need Thor to agree with us!" exclaimed Tony.

"Thor is in Asgard. He'll be alright with it."

"We need Shakespeare's approval!"

"No. You need your fiancee's approval," said Pepper. "I say yes."

Tony gawked in mock hurt. "Pepper!"

"Tony, it's okay! He won't cause any trouble."

"Stark, this boy has sacrificed his freedom just to keep New York safe. He's a crime fighter while you are sleeping, all while being a advanced placement student."

"He's staying," confirmed Steve.

"So that's it?" exclaimed Tony.

"Majority wins."

"Alright, Peter will be here in three weeks. Good luck."

With that, Nick Fury signed off.

Tony stood still, then he turned around with a small glare over to Steve.

"Traitor."

Steve sighed. "Give the kid a chance, Tony."

"Give me a night and I'll think about it."

"Well, you've got three weeks to think about it," said Steve with a shrug. "I think you'll change your mind."

"Alright, I'll be in the training room," said Natasha.

"Lab."

"Office."

"Stark, I don't know about you, but I'm going to the kitchen. Later," Clint stood up and headed to the door.

"Tony, read the rest of the files. trust me, you'll change your opinion. Says here, he's pretty good at science-y stuff, maybe you two can find something in common."

With that, Steve stood up and left.

Tony stood still, looking at the files on the screen of Spider-Man.

_Change your opinion...Yeah, right._

He began skimming over the articles and pulled up the files from SHIELD on the monitor next to it.

Evidence found in his home of broken and damaged web shooters. Also many Oscorp designs stolen and modified for his own benefit.

_Okay, maybe I think I'm gonna like this kid._

* * *

**A/N: How's that? ;D My beta is just awesome. She wins all of the awards. Might post chapter two sometime this week, depends on how far I get on writing it. Oh and if you get the title references, you are awesome. all of you are awesome.  
Thanks for reading! Review!  
-Esmeralda**


	2. Newcomer

_A/N: hey guys! This is a long chapter. :D Thanks for the feedback! It was way more than I expected actually. Thank you all! -hugs and gives cupcakes- Have all the cakes!_

_Thank you very much to my beta, Kat. You fantastic beta you. This fic would be a hopeless case without you. Major shout out to her!_

_Disclaimer is the same, enjoy!_

* * *

Peter Parker, Newcomer

* * *

Whoa." Peter looked up at the tower.

_That is an intimidating tower._

He pushed up his glasses and took in the view in front of him.

_Damn...That is ONE intimidating tower..._

It felt like it was only yesterday when he came home to see three guys in suits sitting down having coffee with his aunt May. In reality, it was only a month ago.

Yeah, S.H.I.E.L.D. decides things for him very quickly.

According to what the agents told him, he was going to be under watch. By the Avengers. Of course, it would only be temporarily, and he's pretty sure Earth's Mightiest Heroes would get sick of his face eventually. But the question was why?

Ever since the Lizard, he stayed out of view.

He had only visited Stark Tower once. It was in the 9th grade, as part of his physics unit. He was so very fascinated...I mean, mechanics and physics in one place? Hello future employment.

But that was before he found the tiny radioactive spider that would change his life completely. Two years of being Spider-Man, and he was dealing with being a high school student at Midtown pretty well. Better than he expected actually, but then again, you can't really finish your Spanish homework after stopping a robbery and keeping it all a secret from your aunt.

With Gwen Stacy's help, he was managing his high school life...Sort of.

She would take the notes he didn't undertand, which were a few to be honest and she would simplify them.

Homework during the afternoon and underneath the notes, dinner in the evening, and then it was crime busting time. That was his schedule for the majority of the days.

It was now his everyday life.

Well, it _was_.

Then, an organization called S.H.I.E.L.D. has to come along and shake things up for him.

He was pretty sure his aunt knew all of it though already. She didn't exactly seem shocked when he showed her the mask and uniform.

"I thought so."

"What?!...how?!"

"You aren't exactly stealthy when you stumble inside like a drunk cat through the fire escape."

Ouch.

"Oh..."

Well, it wasn't his fault for nearly twisting his ankle in stopping a robbery. That thief had pretty good aim with a rock after all. Well, before the cops got them.

"Peter, hiding this much of a secret from me? How long have you been doing this?" she asked.

"Two years..." mumbled Peter.

"Peter, why?"

"I didn't want you to get hurt,"

"Don't get in any trouble, Peter."

"I won't," promised Aunt May.

"Good."

She took it way better than he expected.

Waaaay better.

Despite what S.H.I.E.L.D told him, he told Gwen. She had to know. Obviously.

"What?!" she exclaimed on the phone.

"Yeah," replied Peter sheepishly.

"Out of all the groups... The Avengers?" she asked.

"Pretty much."

"But _why_?"

"They said to 'keep an eye on me' but I haven't gotten into trouble in a long time."

"Will you still go to Midtown?" she asked.

"Yeah. It might take me a while to get there though. I still don't know how to drive."

"Hopefully Tony Stark will spare some cars for you."

Peter chuckled. "Doubt it."

Now, a month later, he was in the elevator of what is now his new home.

No, it wasn't home. He didn't feel comfortable.

A place where he was being under watch of Earth's Mightiest Heroes. He wasn't here by will. Home is where the heart is. His heart wasn't here.

This wasn't home. This was just temporal headquarters.

Well, for now it was.

* * *

Meanwhile...

"Tony, at least clean yourself up!"

"Pep, I'm making a new armor. I can't clean up until I'm done," said Tony, wiping his forehead with his sleeve.

"Jarvis, when is Peter arriving?" asked Pepper.

"In a few moments."

"Tony, I will personally drag you into the shower if you don't go."

"Well, when you put it that way... I wouldn't mind," he winked.

…

Smack!

"Ow, damn! What's that clipboard made of?! Spare suit parts?!" exclaimed Tony.

"No, all the paperwork you still have to fill out. Go take a shower. Now." Pepper ordered.

"Fine, fine." Tony gave in, lifting his grease stained hands up in surrender. "I'll go shower."

Automatically, the music turned off and the prototype suit was being pulled away, into its containment unit in the wall.

"But you still owe me."

"Fine. Tonight?" asked Pepper.

"All fine by me," smirked Tony giving her his mischievous eyes.

"Go shower."

"Alright... Love you."

"Love you too. Now move it!"

* * *

One down, three to go.

Clint prepared his bow, focusing on the target in front of him.

The archery range on his floor was a great for training, or to just spend time. It's always best to be at your best, especially now if you have to keep look out for the team during missions, and the good thing...

He never misses.

He pulled out an explosive arrow, one he had been waiting to use just for this target. The large bright red robotic target, made by Tony Stark himself, was 9 feet tall and moving. To be honest though, it just reminded him of a giant robotic bear Clint shuddered.

Never again are they going camping. Ever.

Just before he was going to release the arrow, Jarvis spoke up breaking his concentration.

"Mr. Barton, you are requested in the main room."

And he was really looking foward to use that arrow.

"Is the Peter Piper kid or whatever here?" asked Clint.

"He's on his way up."

"Alright, thanks Jarvis."

Honestly, how can a guy as snarky as Tony make an AI that is so polite? Maybe it was the accent? Then again, British accents make anything sound polite. With a shrug, he began to take of his quiver and gloves. Though...not before he shot the arrow at the moving target.

3, 2, 1...

Boom.

Damn straight.

He never misses.

* * *

Steve was already in the living room with Natasha who was reading, curled up in a love seat. He didn't really have anything to do in the other parts of the tower that day. His day was go to the gym, work out, done. That was it.

Bruce was in his lab, analyzing his newest project. He had been there the entire morning. Most people would have been bored, studying blueprints, looking at formulas and notes alone. He didn't mind the solitude. He enjoyed it. The rare peace and quiet in the tower was hard to find.

With Tony Stark in the building, it was very hard to have peace and quiet.

So, he didn't see the interrupting AI coming.

"Dr. Banner, you are requested in the main room," spoke Jarvis.

"Oh, alright. I'll be there in a minute," Bruce pulled off his glasses and slipped them into his shirt pocket. He stood up and stretched his arms for a minute before he head out into the hallway. He had seen the files S.H.I.E.L.D. had sent them three weeks ago and read about the newcomer. Smart kid, well-behaved, son of an inspiring scientist. He had briefly associated with Dr. Parker a few years back, before he disappeared.

Other than what he read on the kid, he also knew one thing that didn't have to be on paper: Peter Parker was going to be an interesting addition to the already strange household.

* * *

"Where's Stark?" asked Clint.

"Showering," replied Pepper.

"He's always late," sighed Steve.

"Actually Capsicle, I'm right here," Tony walked down the stairs dressed in his casual AC/DC shirt and jeans.

"Really Stark? AC/DC?" asked Clint, eyeing Tony's shirt with distaste.

"Shut up Legolas, you don't know good music even if it slapped you in the face with a dead fish," replied Tony.

Clint sighed. "Again with the Legolas," he mumbled. He loved Lord of the Rings, but the Legolas jokes were getting kind of old. "Y'know, I have a name."

"And shitty taste of music."

"You want to go there, Buckethead?" asked Clint.

"Bring it on, Robin Hood."

_Ding._

The elevator doors opened and Peter stepped out.

"I have a very good taste of music, thank you very much," said Clint, crossing his arms.

"Guys," said Natasha, noticing Peter.

"Oh really? In what realm is Train considered good music, 50 ways to say crap?" asked Tony.

"Oh you did NOT just go there!" snapped Clint. "Guys."

"Yes, I just did," said Tony.

"For the love of God! Tony! Clint!" exclaimed Pepper.

"What?!" both Avengers replied.

"Peter's here."

"Oh." Peter glanced at the Avengers, all sitting on the leather couch. Well, most of them sitting on the leather couch. Never in his life would have Peter thought he would witness Hawkeye arguing with Iron Man about music.

Especially about Train and AC/DC.

"Um... Hi," greeted Peter.

Awkward silence.

"Hi! You must be Peter," smiled Pepper.

"I'm Pepper Potts. Secretary and Tony's assistant."

"I'm Steve Rogers," Steve greeted, "Or Captain America, sometimes."

"Bruce Banner," Bruce gave a small wave. "Just call me Bruce."

"Natasha Romanoff," said Natasha.

"The name is Tony Stark, you probably already knew that," Tony approached Peter. "And that one with the vest is Clint Barton, the guy with the shittiest taste of music in all of New York."

"Hey!" exclaimed Clint. "I don't have shitty taste of music!"

"You have the entire album on your phone!" exclaimed Tony.

"You have the entire CD collection!" Clint backfired.

"They're classics!" retorted Tony.

"Nat, help me out here!" exclaimed Clint.

"No, you're right Tony. His taste in music is the worst in the nation," said Natasha.

"Tasha!" gasped Clint. "You hurt me."

"The truth hurts," shrugged Natasha.

"Natasha, you're my new favorite," smirked Tony.

"I thought the Cap was your favorite," said Clint.

"I know Tasha is your favorite in other things."

WHAM.

"Back on task!" announced Pepper, smacking the clipboard against the couch loudly, everyone jumping.

Peter pushed his glasses up. "I'm Peter... But you guys already knew that."

"We've heard plenty about you," said Steve. "Good things, obviously."

_Except for the whole vigilante stuff..._

"And you're the guy with the webs" added Tony. "You seem to have plenty experience with them," he remarked.

"I've only had them since I was 15. About two years now with them," said Peter.

"Two years or two weeks, you're still pretty good." noted Bruce.

Peter knew a little bit about the Avengers. Well, he knew that they saved the world from an alien army. And that Tony Stark was in it along with five others. Captain America, the Hulk, Black Widow, Hawkeye and Thor.

Six in total.

_Wait a second..._

"Correct me if I'm wrong, but aren't there supposed to be six of you?" asked Peter.

"You right. We're missing Mr. Drapery," remarked Tony.

"Who?" asked Peter, slightly confused.

"Thor," answered Steve.

"Oh," replied Peter.

"Y'know, tall, buff, has L'oreal Asgard worthy blonde hair," nodded Tony.

L'oreal...Asgard?

"Asgard as in...Asgard?" asked Peter.

"Yep. The Norse mythology guy. That apparently is real," nodded Clint.

"He's in Asgard, taking care of some issues about Loki," added Bruce.

_Loki? Whoa whoa whoa..._

"Whoa, like the Loki that tried to mess up Manhattan last summer?" asked Peter.

"Yep, that's the douchebag we had to deal with." Clint grimaced.

Tall buff and blonde... Peter shuddered internally. Hopefully the all mighty hammer wielding Thor won't mind having him around...

"Thor won't mind me being here?" asked Peter.

"Relax kid, he's a sweet guy. He won't mind," said Tony, clapping him on the back.

"I thought everyone knew about the mess in Manhattan," remarked Bruce.

"Well, I was in Seattle for a week to visit a family friend and didn't hear about it until after it happened." Peter had left the weekend before the entire ordeal. He and his aunt went to visit an old friend. When they came back, well... There was quite a mess.

Traffic, cement, debrise, smog. It was crazy. And that's just from his point of view in Queens. He didn't really know what was going on till he got home and saw the newspaper sitting on the doorstep.

"ONE WEEK. ALL I DID WAS LEAVE FOR ONE WEEK! ONE MOTHERHUGGING WEEK! THIS IS WHY WE CAN'T HAVE NICE THINGS!" he had yelled when he saw the headlines on the Chronicle.

Needless to say, he was pretty shocked for a couple of days.

Because apparently _allllll_ of the crazy stuff happens right after he leaves the city.

"Say kid, you don't like Train?" asked Tony.

Peter frowned. "I don't listen to them."

"Good. You'll be alright. Jarvis, lead Peter to his room."

"Right this way, Mr. Parker." Peter jumped a little bit and looked around.

"Who was that?!" he exclaimed, alarmed.

_Did whatever just talked... have a British accent?!_

"Oh, that's my AI, Jarvis. He'll help you with anything. Just call him. Avengers disassemble." The Avengers disbanded and each set off into their own directions. Steve headed down to his floor and Bruce to his lab.

Natasha stood up, gathering her books and blanket when Peter spoke.

"Um, Ms. Romanoff... is that normal?" he asked, pointing to Clint and Tony who were heading off to their respective destinations.

"It's Natasha. Do you mean them acting like two jackasses?" asked Natasha.

Peter didn't know what to call it so he nodded. "Yeah...Pretty much."

Natasha shrugged. "It's normal. And this is one of their good days."

She continued to the elevator.

Peter blinked and began going down the hallway.

"Peter, if you need anything, tell me," said Pepper before she went to the office.

"Okay, thanks."

A British artificial intelligence, two music feuding Avengers, a Norse god with L'Oreal worthy blonde hair...

Well, not even twenty minutes in exactly being in Avengers/Stark Tower and he already knew one thing for sure: living with the Avengers was going to be really interesting.

And by interesting, I mean _really_ interesting.

* * *

_A/N: How was that? Don't get me wrong. I LOVE AC/DC and Train. But I can see Clint as a Train fan though. And him and Tony fighting over music tastes, ehehe. My headcanon is that Clint Barton loves Train. ESME CLAIMS THAT HEADCANON. -slams gavel on desk- :3 Hopefully it wasn't OOC. Thank you for reading! Review~  
-Esmeralda_


	3. Clint Barton is NOT a Morning Hawk

**A/N: hey guys! thank you so much for the reviews/faves/alerts! It means a lot to me. Another chapter with our favorite archer, Clint! :D And Tony being Tony. Oh yeah. New poll will be up for the next chapter! Shout out to Kat for being an awesome beta! Woo! I think people can kind of relate to this chapter. You'll see why. n_n  
I don't own the Avengers or Peter Parker. I'm just a girl that writes fanfiction.  
Enjoy!**

* * *

Clint Barton, NOT a Morning Hawk

* * *

Beeeeeep.

Beeeeeep.

Beeeeeep.

Clint groaned and opened his eyes.

_Ugh, waking up._

He glanced over to his alarm clock, hoping to see that he still had an hour left to sleep in.

The still beeping alarm clock's bright red numbers stared back at him; 7:41 AM.

He had to go to work at 8AM.

_Fuck._

Beeeeeeep. Beeeeeep.

With a small grumble, he slammed the snooze button and the alarm shut up.

Who wouldn't be tired after eight hours of training, with only one 30 minute break? He didn't even eat dinner, which is saying something because Pepper is a fantastic cook and wouldn't miss it for the world.

But no, he was too tired to join the Avengers, and Peter, at the table. Mumbling an excuse, he had taken a quick shower and literally crashed onto the bed.

It was around 9 PM when he finally began falling asleep.

But 9 PM is when the mechanic side of Tony comes out.

Once Clint closed his eyes, the sounds of Tony hammering away in the R&D Floor A above him echoed loudly.

Then they stopped.

_Finally._

Only with Tony replacing the hammer with a power drill.

Clint groaned and covered his head with his pillow.

Then Shoot to Thrill blasted and shook the ceiling.

"I swear, I'm going to sleep in the garage," Clint mumbled.

He didn't sleep in the garage. Or any other room on his floor. He was simply too tired to really do anything.

He needed to have Tony soundproof that lab or else he's going to shoot an arrow at one of the suits one of these days.

And that's saying something.

The racket continued for the _entire_ night.

It was a night where he really hated that he chose the floor underneath the R&D Floor A.

He thought about it for a moment; to sleep in or to not sleep in? To skip work or to go to work?

_Screw work, I need to sleep._

Ditching work for one day wouldn't hurt him, right?

He sighed and pulled the blanket over his head. It won't hurt to skip a day...

Just when the sleep began returning, Tony Stark came in.

"GOOOOOOOOOOOD MORNING KATNISSSSSS!" Tony's voice came loudly from the somehow discrete speakers in the ceiling.

"AHHHHHHHHHHHH! HOLY SHIT!" exclaimed Clint, tumbling out of bed.

Upstairs, Tony was laughing madly at his lab table, clutching the microphone he used to make announcements, or wake up calls, with the speakers.

Yes, all the bedrooms in Stark Tower had hidden speakers. No one really knows why.

Clint rubbed his head. "Dammit Stark! What the hell was that for?!" he shouted angrily at the ceiling.

"Because I wanted to," snickered Tony.

Clint groaned. No one can get a day of peace with Stark around.

"Still though, better move your ass over to SHIELD, Legolas. Cyclops is waiting," said Tony.

"I'm going to shoot an arrow to your prototype suit," growled Clint, standing up and rubbing his head.

"Not before I blast you back to Budapest," said Tony with the rare 'I'm talkin' the real deal' tone.

"...Screw you."

"No thank you, I'm engaged. Now move it, Merida." With that, Tony turned off his microphone.

Clint narrowed his eyes at the ceiling and got dressed with his uniform. He walked down the stairs to the main floor, mumbling and cursing at Tony.

_Damn Tony... Damn Stark... Damn light sleep..._

It was surprisingly not loud in the kitchen that morning. Steve was already dressed, drinking coffee. Peter was eating cereal, talking with Pepper. Bruce was reading the newspaper.

It was peaceful.

Unusually peaceful.

_Too peaceful..._

Meh, probably because Tony wasn't there.

He shrugged as he stifled a yawn. "Morning," he greeted.

"Hey," nodded Peter.

"Where's Tasha?" asked Clint.

"Asleep," Peter drank orange juice.

Clint raised an eyebrow. "Is she ditching work?" he asked.

Everyone in the kitchen glanced at Clint.

"No," said Steve slowly.

"Then why isn't she up?" asked Clint.

"It's Sunday," finished Peter.

Clint glanced at the large calendar on the wall.

Sunday.

…

_Stark is going to pay_.

"STARRRRRK!" Clint yelled and ran to the elevator. There was a beep, then a loud slam.

Silence.

Then the loud thuds and clanking of metal erupted.

"CALM YOUR SHIT KATNISS."

"DAMN YOU STARK!"

"GET OFF OF ME! OWW!"

"I NEED MY GODDAMN SLEEP. YOU'RE GOING TO PAY!"

"NO!"

Thud.

Silence.

"Ow..."

A few moments later, Clint came back down from the lab, looking bruise less and stoic.

"I will be sleeping," he stated and went back to his floor.

Not long after that, Tony came back on the speakers in the kitchen.

"Pep, can you come and help me?" he asked, voice in pure pain.

Pepper thought about it for a moment. "No."

A strange noise between a dying whale and groan came from the speakers as they shut off.

It was silent for a few moments in the kitchen.

Peter glanced at the speakers, then at the elevator. Then the elevator to the speakers.

_What the hell did I just witness?_

Steve sighed and just continued drinking his coffee.

Bruce looked at the elevator and shrugged. He turned around to face Pepper.

"So how's your morning?" asked Bruce.

* * *

**A/N: That was fun to write. XD Oh Clint. You just want to sleep. I know that feel. I really do. Well, thanks for reading! Review!~  
-Esmeralda**


	4. Dinner with the Avengers: Budapest

_**A/N: Hey guys! Over 1,000 views?! OH GLOB. Y'all are epic. :) Thank you! hugs fo! Hugs for everyone! Okay, this is gonna be centered around all of the Avengers. Y'all voted in the poll... But I got ties, soooo I decided to make this chap more domestic Avengers centric. With dinner. And Tony.**_

_**I wrote about 97% of this on my own. Beta did her awesomeness and looked over it. I am getting the hang of this, you guys. :D **_

_**This is my theory of how Tony tries to find out what happened in Budapest. **_

_**Or simply, family dinners in the Avengers Household.**_

_**I don't own the Avengers. **_

_**Enjoy!**_

* * *

Dinner with the Avengers: Budapest

* * *

It was silent around the dinner table.

In the main dining room, everyone was eating silently. The spaghetti Pepper had made was fantastic as usual. Peter glanced around, comfortable with the silence and the casualness.

Here, they didn't have to be fancy or dress up for dinner. Unless it was for a special occasion, let it be a business meeting or a really formal event. Tony though, always had to wash up and change his clothes before he even stepped inside the dining room.

Which was kind of useless, because he worked on his prototypes after dinner and ended up with more oil on himself than he had before.

Everyone wore some jeans a long sleeve shirt. Even though the tower had the heater on, you could still feel the cold radiating from the large windows.

But yes, it was all comfortable and nice.

Until Tony Stark dropped his fork.

"I have to know." he stated firmly.

Clint had barely put some a meatball in his mouth when he looked over to Tony.

"Have to know what?" he asked, chewing his meatball.

"Budapest."

And that was when shit began going down.

It was silent once again.

Natasha wiped her mouth with a napkin slowly before she spoke.

"Budapest."

"Yes. Budapest," Tony nodded firmly.

She folded her napkin in half and put it next to the plate. "Why?" she asked.

"Because it's been driving me crazy!" Tony lightly pounded his fist on the table. "It's been almost half a year and you still haven't drop a single damn hint!"

"Oh good lord," sighed Clint.

"Stark has a point though; what did happen in Budapest anyways?" asked Steve.

"See? Now you got the Captain curious!" said Tony. "That's how desperate we want to know!"

"Hey!" exclaimed Steve.

"Budapest?" asked Peter, confused on the situation.

Tony looked at Peter, frowning. "Wait a sec, didn't you hear-Oh. Right. You were in Seattle. Well, to put it bluntly, Budapest is apparently these guys," he pointed to Natasha and Clint "major secret."

Both Natasha and Clint sighed again.

"Yet they oh so happened to bring it up in the battle of our lives, which sparked my curiosity therefore I have to know."

"Tony-" began Clint.

"I know you're going to deny it happened, Katniss!" proclaimed Tony.

"Tony! Let me finish!"

"I have evidence! JARVIS!" Tony called up to the ceiling to the unseen speakers.

"Yes sir?" asked the AI.

"Play it."

"...You recorded the conversation?" asked Clint.

"Shut up Barton, it was on the team comm. link. Play it!"

On the speakers, the dim noises of gunshots sounded. Then, clear as day, you could hear Natasha's voice.

"This is like Budapest all over again!"

"You and I remember Budapest _very_differently."

Tony looked over at Natasha and Clint. "Well? Whatcha got to say to that?" he asked.

It was silent for a few moments at the dinner table.

"You recorded the fucking conversation?" asked Clint.

"Clint! Language!" exclaimed Pepper.

"Sorry, Pepper." Clint quickly apologized. "But seriously Tony, why would you record that?!"

"Don't look at me! Jarvis does it by default!"

"Actually sir, you told me to record and save that part."

"Shut up, Jarv. Nobody asked you. Back to the point," Tony lifted his fork and pointed to Natasha and Clint.

"What happened in Budapest?"

Natasha glanced at Clint. "Um..."

"Wait...Is Budapest a code for sex?" asked Tony.

"Tony!" exclaimed Bruce.

"We're eating dinner!" added Pepper.

"And Peter is listening to everything!" Steve motioned over to Peter, who was staring awkwardly at his spaghetti, trying to recollect what he had just heard.

"Oh... Right, I'm sorry Pete. I truly am," apologized Tony.

"It's okay," said Peter, a little disturbed from what he had just heard. He swallowed some spaghetti.

"Okay, since lil Petey here is kind of disturbed, let's make it easier for everybody." announced Tony.

"You're going to stop talking?" asked Clint.

"Nope. Did you two fondue?" asked Tony.

Steve nearly choked on his iced tea.

Clint and Natasha looked at each other, then at Tony.

"_Fondue_?" asked Natasha.

"Oh yeah." grinned Tony.

Steve cleared his throat and looked at Tony. "How?!" he exclaimed.

"Dad told me," snickered Tony. "Perfect blackmail."

"Fondue?" asked Bruce, still confused about the situation.

"Like cheese and bread?" asked Peter.

That caused Steve even more despair. He held his head in his hands. "Sweet lord..." he muttered, hoping for them to move on and change the subject.

"Do I tell them?" asked Tony.

"No. Please don't," replied Steve, desperate.

"Still gonna tell them."

"I am so done with you, Tony Stark."

"You'll still love me anyways Capsicle. Steve thought fondue meant sex."

Bruce bit his lip, trying not to chuckle.

Peter quickly cleared his throat and began standing up. "Excuse me," he mumbled.

"See Tony?! This is why we can't have dinner in peace!" Pepper slapped Tony's arm.

"I'm actually done eating, it's okay," said Peter, picking up his plate. "I'm not hungry anymore."

"What about dessert?" asked Pepper.

"What are we having?" asked Peter.

"Fondue," smirked Tony.

It was silent again.

This time Steve sighed and stood up. "I think I'm going to sleep early tonight."

Tony cracked up. Pepper rolled her eyes and slapped his arm. "Tony."

"Ow!" he rubbed his arm. "What?" asked Tony.

"Behave."

"I was kidding! It's actually souffle!" he announced.

"Not hungry anyways," Peter replied. "Sorry Pepper."

"It's okay Peter. Don't worry about it," smiled Pepper. "Blame Tony." she

"Hey!"

"The spaghetti was good though," said Steve.

"Thank you Steve."

"Now you're just trying to escape, huh?" asked Tony.

"Wouldn't blame him, Buckethead."

"Shut it Merida."

"At least I get new comebacks, dumbass."

"Language!" exclaimed Pepper.

"Sorry Pep."

"Tell me what happened in Budapest, Legolas!" Tony pounded his fist lightly on the table.

"Never!"

"I'll just leave now..." Peter crept out of the room silently.

"I'll go with you," said Steve.

* * *

**_A/N: Oh Tony. You will never find out what happened in Budapest. Ever. XD Boy, was this fun to write. But I'm being serious here: we need to find out what happened in Budapest. Well, the poll will be up. _**

**_And I'll put it bluntly; your votes/reviews=faster update. Your reviews help me write faster. C'mon guys, it won't hurt. Please?_**

**_Next chapter will be 2,000 words or more. I am not backing out of this._**

**_Well, thanks for reading! Review!  
-Esmeralda  
_**


	5. Weirdest midnight trip to the kitchen

**A/N: Hey! Thanks for all of the alerts/faves/review! **

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**And my reviewers from last chapter: StormGazer, ****mrmistoffelees**** A Little Lost 1,**** and Rudolph-001 -cues applause-**

**And no, this author's note is not 2000 words. It's around 190 or whatever. But seriously though, this took me and Kat awhile to write. Both the note and the chapter. But dear glob, this was so much fun to write.**

**Oh, and if I didn't put you on the list, I'm sorry. I still love you. **

**Disclaimer: I don't own them. Only MARVEL does. Legit? Okay.**

**Enjoy!  
**

* * *

The weirdest midnight trip to the kitchen.

* * *

It had been three weeks of living with the Avengers and so much crazy has happened.

No, Bruce hasn't hulked out. There hasn't been an alien invasion in Manhattan. There hasn't been any freak storms or blizzards. There hasn't been _that_ many explosions from Tony's lab.

But one of the crazy things was the fact that Peter continued living life...normally.

Yeah, totally ironic coming from the guy who's [was] Spider-Man.

Peter had continued going to school. It was way easier than he expected. He just woke up earlier than he did before and took the subway. Tony insisted that he took one of his cars, but showing up to Midtown in a very expensive looking Mercedes was going to raise a lot of questions and the last thing Peter wanted was attention.

Besides, Peter didn't know how to drive to save his life.

You see, Spider-Man had been laying low for the past two years. Ever since the Lizard incident, he took a small break from crime busting. But less than a month later, he was back in the game. But this time, he stayed out of the tabloids or the police's attention.

…..

Okay, maybe they did want to arrest him just a _little _bit...

...Or a lot...

But that didn't stop him from being the friendly neighborhood Spider-Man that [most of] Queens knew and loved.

Before the Avengers showed up, he had to deal with criminals in Queens. And he did a good job at it, for the most part. He stayed out of the cops's radar.

And even after the Avengers made their stay in Manhattan permanent, he still continued being Spider-Man.

Some things just didn't change.

He lived his double life and continued for a good while. Stopping robberies,

And well, you know the rest. SHIELD came in, "kid, you're gonna be living with the Avengers", whoa that's a tall tower, Budapest talk, speakers in the ceilings, Katniss, AC/DC, Merida and such.

Peter continued being himself. AP Student, good kid.

But he hasn't hung up his suit forever. Just for the time being, it was on pause. It's in the back of his new closet, ready to be used. It might have collected some dust though, but it's nothing a quick clean can't fix.

But moving into the household, the crazy always followed.

The Avengers were celebrities. Well, who wouldn't be famous after saving both New York and the world from Loki and the Chitauri army?

People expect celebrities to live the life. Y'know, go to wine tastings, have the luxuries, the glamorous, fabulous Tony Stark/Fergie life.

But that's not the stereotype the Avengers file under.

They have the strangest household with the most eclectic members. Eclectic being diverse and...odd in this case.

Speaking of the odd, apparently Clint likes to sleep in other places that is not his bed.

Especially the main kitchen.

* * *

3:40 AM

Peter was half asleep, his throat was dry and tired. He rolled out of bed, mumbling and wanting a glass of water.

Or milk. Something cold that would suit his thirst. Anything really.

He put on his glasses and began heading down to the kitchen.

Jarvis, being the badass AI he is, turned on the lights in the living room in order for Peter not to trip.

"Thanks Jarvis," mumbled Peter.

He was getting used to having a very polite AI around the tower. It kind of reminded him of Google. He couldn't find someone, all he had to do was ask Jarvis. He didn't know where the resource department was, he asked Jarvis. He needed to find something online, he asked Jarvis.

Jarvis is just fantastic. He was a really cool AI. And he had a British accent, which made it ten times better than he already was.

Heck, Tony had Jarvis sync Peter's iTunes library [giving him props on it being free of Train and anything related to their music, and having Clint flipping Tony off and telling him to go fuck himself] so whenever Peter felt like it, he could listen to his music in his room on the speakers. Unless Tony interrupted, which was rarely.

So far, the Avengers had been treating him kindly. It couldn't stop him from feeling awkward though. He was used to being a loner. And seeing the Avengers interact and play with each other was... fairly new to him.

Anyways, back to reality.

Jarvis, again, turned on the lights in the kitchen.

Peter made it to the kitchen and searched for a plastic cup. In the end, he settled on getting some milk.

He set the cup on the counter and headed over to the refrigerator. He pulled

"Morning Webhead," greeted a voice slyly.

"AHHH!" Peter yelped, jumping and clinging onto the wall.

He couldn't help it. It was instinct that came with the bite. Well, it was more like him and the bite mixed. He was already jumpy before the bite. And somehow, the habit of jumping to the nearest wall came along.

Which made things very very very awkward sometimes.

There was laughter coming from the top of the refrigerator.

"Clint?!" exclaimed Peter.

"Hahahaha! Got you good!" laughed Clint, sitting cross legged on top of the refrigerator. He was in his pajamas and there was a blanket behind him.

"What the hell was that for?" asked Peter, not moving from the wall.

"For a minute, I thought you were Stark. Then you turned out to not be him. And I thought 'Dammit'. But since I was already here, why not scare ya?" Clint smirked.

Peter couldn't find an explanation.

"Aren't you supposed to be asleep? It's 3 in the morning!" exclaimed Peter. "And what are you doing on the refrigerator?!"

"Gosh Mom, calm down a bit. I sleep over here sometimes. Just to scare Stark or Steve," replied Clint. He chuckled. "Hehe, you're on the wall."

"Shut up," Peter mumbled, crawling off.

On the speakers, a sleepy sounding Tony announced.

"Ahem, Barton, please do kindly go the fuck to sleep. You too Parks and Recreation. It's a school night."

Peter froze.

_How..._

"That's right, Peter. I know you watch that show religiously. And I know you watch Hart of Dixie too, Hawkass."

"It was one time! Bruce talked me into it!" Clint said to the ceiling.

"Said the man that has all the seasons on Netflix!" countered Tony.

There was some noise on the speakers.

"All three of you, go to sleep," said an exhausted Steve.

"How did you get the mike to your room, Capsicle?" asked Tony, puzzled.

"You left it there last night after you two foundued," Clint said with a smirk.

"Shut the fuck up Merida," replied Tony.

"Make me Tony. You're talking from a speaker right now."

"All I want is a glass of milk!" exclaimed Peter.

"I had Jarvis find me a spare microphone in case of emergencies," explained Steve. "But in all seriousness, Stark, Barton, Peter, go to sleep. Or I'll bring in Tasha."

…...

"Goodnight guys. I value my life," Clint picked up his blanket and crawled into the air ducts.

"Night Capsicle. Parks and Recreation, Hawkass," Tony turned off his mike.

"See you in the morning." Steve turned off his and went back to sleep.

Peter was left in silence as he poured himself a glass of milk. Once it was empty, he put the glass in the sink, the milk in the refrigerator and Jarvis turned off the lights.

The lights in the main room shut off as he entered the hallway and into his room.

He crawled back into his bed and he looked at the ceiling for a few minutes.

That was...The _weirdest_ midnight trip to the kitchen.

Ever.

Then again, weird was only an understatement in the Avengers household.

* * *

**A/N: Wow, that was so much fun to write! Okay, maybe I didn't make it to 2,000 words, but I tried.**

**And thank you for getting this fic to have over 2,562 views! You guys are amazing!**

**Thank you for reading!**

**Review!~**

**-Esmeralda **


	6. Tell me about the Avengers'

_A/N: Holy skittles, the feedback made me squeal of joy c:_

_AND FINALS ARE OFFICIALLY OVER. -throws arms up in relief- IT WAS LIKE SHARK WEEK, ONLY WITH PRE-AP FINALS. SHARK WEEK I TELL YOU. __**SHARK WEEK.**_

_But yaaaay! Holiday break! :D Woot woooot!_

_Thanks to the favers: __HuntressofArtemis310, impossiblynot, battleofwits, Kermit's Soft Kitty, Fallenqueen2, Rebecca13787, Ashtree1165 and Agent-Hamilton123._

_The followers: __sarahabruce85, where the wind blows, XZazaX, battleofwits, gaarastolemyname13, Thgpjohootkc, winterwings55555, Rebecca13787, Ashtree1165, Agent-Hamilton123, Windsofdreams and johncorn._

_And the reviewers: __where the wind blows, Sorida, Web of Obsidian, johncorn, Agent-Hamilton123, lexikay98, QUEENOFTHEDEMONS [Guest], KRAlover and Kermit's Soft Kitty._

_Oh and as much as I ship Stony, Clint was just being a smartass. [Like always] No, Steve and Tony are not together. Sorry readers! I'd like to keep it Pepperony. I might write a Stony one shot in the future though. _

_This one is slightly different. I don't own the Avengers. Enjoy!_

* * *

"Tell me about the Avengers."

* * *

Peter was in AP Physics when he heard the most five plot twisting words ever.

"Tell me about the Avengers."

Oh shit.

Someone knew.

"What are you talking about?!" he exclaimed a little too loudly, earning some strange glances from the other students around the room.

There was a small laugh coming from the seat in front of him. He looked up and saw who it was.

Gwen Stacy.

"Oh hi Gwen..." mumbled Peter.

"Sooo are you going to tell me about your super housemates or...?" asked Gwen.

Other than Aunt May, Gwen was the only one that knew of his new address, temporary headquarters and life. The reason was simple: he trusted Gwen with his life and secrets.

And apparently, she has taken an interest on what it's like to live in a household full of crazy.

Peter looked around. For all he knew, Clint could be hiding in the air ducts. Or there could be SHIELD agents disguised as students around him.

"Can I tell you later? Like after school? Somewhere private?" he asked.

Gwen raised her eyebrows. "Wow, that much of a secret to keep from your girlfriend?" she asked sarcastically.

_[Yep. They're in a relationship. Big surprise. Actually, not really. Y'all saw it coming anyways.]_

"No, it's not that...More like there could be SHIELD agents listening to us right now," replied Peter, eyes darting quickly around the room, looking at the air ducts.

Gwen thought about it, then she nodded. "Agreed. My house after school?" she asked.

"Yes."

If Peter was going to keep one secret from his new housemates, it would have to be him being in a relationship.

He could already imagine the comments from Tony and Clint...

"Hello? This is Tony Stark speaking on the intercom for everyone in the household to hear. I would like to announce that Peter has a girlfriend. That is all."

Yeah, Tony would do that.

On the other hand, Clint would be more snarky. He would most likely pop up in the air ducts of Peter's room and yell "Use protection!"

Steve might just shrug it off. He doesn't ponder into people's lives like Stark.

With Natasha, she might want to meet Gwen. They could become best friends for all he knew.

Bruce won't really care.

But overall, he just wanted to keep Gwen a secret. Other than the teasing, the true reason why was that SHIELD knew everything about him. They knew about his parents, the Lizard incident, the double life, his uncle, where he lived and currently lives, his night vocation of being Spider-Man.

For all he knows, SHIELD could know his own shoe size and if he ever got a detention in middle school.

They knew his personal life more than he knew it himself.

The feeling of keeping something a secret can be different to others. It can bring a burden, relief, alarm, peace, anything.

For Peter, it brought comfort.

Keeping Gwen and him being in a relationship a secret made him feel normal. A normal high school kid that has a girlfriend.

When he was with Gwen, he was normal.

The quiet, shy kid that sat behind her in Pre-AP physics in the 10th grade before his life changed.

* * *

_After school..._

* * *

They decide to get some coffee, just for the heck of it. The cool autumn winds were starting to develop in Queens and coffee was just awesome. They stayed in the coffee shop for a while then headed to Gwen's place.

Peter glanced around Gwen's room. Oh he missed it. It was a nice room. Brought back memories of jumping in through the window, having late night chats, hanging out, kissing and just being himself.

"Feels like home," he sighed, tossing his backpack onto the floor.

Gwen's room did feel like home. He was comfortable there. It was a place he was familiar with and where he can let loose and be him.

He sat down at the foot of her bed as Gwen sat down on the chair.

"Now will you tell me about the super housemates?" she asked.

"Yeah," smiled Peter. "Where do I start?"

"Start with Captain America."

_Hmm. The Cap..._

"Well...You know some stuff about him. He was frozen in ice for 70 years, woke up in this world."

"I mean like how is he? Funny? Friendly?" asked Gwen.

"Well...He's serious."

It was true. Steve was a serious man. And well mannered. He had his moments of adjusting to the 21st century though...

"Like, how serious?" asked Gwen.

Peter bit his lip, thinking. "Well... He's polite. But he has his 'what the hell is this' moments. I mean, things really change after being in the ice for 70 years... He's adjusting. But Tony just likes to mess with him and they argue a lot. Clint thinks that they need to just have sex and get over with it, but he's just being a smartass..."

Gwen frowned. "Who's Clint?"

_Oh right. Secret identity._

"Hawkeye. He's the guy with the arrows," Peter explained.

"Oh... I remember him! Saw him on the news, my cousin has a major crush on him... He's a smartass?" asked Gwen.

"Yeah. And he has a short temper with Tony. One time, he actually kicked his ass after waking him up with speakers."

"Speakers? Are you kidding me?" Gwen chuckled.

"Nope. All of the rooms, the kitchen, labs, and training wings have speakers. Like an intercom, except that Tony uses it for personal purposes...Like waking someone up or doing whatever he wants to do with them."

"And Black Widow?"

"Natasha? She's just Natasha. Tony picks on her but he ends up backing off because she will kick his ass in a blink of an eye."

"How is Tony like in real life?"

"He's pretty cool," Peter said with a nod. "Snarky as hell."

"Will he let you drive one of his cars soon?"

"Doubt it."

The his phone began beeping loudly.

Peter pulled out his phone from his pocket.

Tony Stark.

"Who is it?" asked Gwen.

"Tony..." mumbled Peter. "I'm sorry...Give me a minute..."

"No, it's fine. Don't worry."

Peter answered "Hello?"

"_Parks and Recreation, it's almost 6 PM. Maybe you should start heading back or SHIELD will sent some agents onto your ass. Don't ask me, it's Cyclops who made this rule. See you."_

Tony hung up.

Wow. Time flew by really fast.

Peter groaned again. "I'm sorry, I have to go..."

"Curfew?" asked Gwen.

"Yeah. I didn't know about it. I'm sorry," Peter stood up and began picking up his backpack.

"No, it's okay. I'll text you later," said Gwen, following Peter out to the door.

He opened the front door and leaned against the doorway. "Sooooo..."

Gwen rolled her eyes and gave him a hug. "There. Now go before you get grounded by your super housemates."

"See you." Peter headed onto the street and to the subway.

* * *

_Later..._

* * *

Peter arrived to the tower and went up to the main floor. He glanced at his phone screen.

7:13 PM

_Fuuuuuuuuuuuuck my lifeeeee._

He groaned once the elevator went ding.

_Ughhhhhh._

Knowing his impending doom, he stepped out and walked onto the main floor.

"So, the Spider has finally arrived," said Tony, sitting on the leather couch.

"Hey guys," greeted Peter sheepishly with a wave.

"Oh! You made it just in time. Dinner is ready," said Pepper.

Peter set down his backpack on the couch and headed to the dining room.

"Sorry I'm late," he apologized as he sat down.

"Who were you with?" asked Tony suddenly.

"Huh?" asked Peter.

"One does not simply go out into the city for two hours without being with someone," said Tony.

"...I go out into the city for two hours without being someone..." said Steve.

"You don't count in that statistic, Capsicle. You're Steve. Anywho," Tony directed his attention to Peter.

"Girlfriend?" he asked.

Peter's eyes widened.

_How did he know?_

"Peter, I was a teenager also. Don't act so surprised," said Tony smoothly.

"Who's the girl?" asked Clint as he bit a enchilada.

_So much for keeping this a secret..._

"How long have you been together?" asked Tony.

"Tony," Pepper warned. "Leave him alone."

"Fine, fine..." Tony raised his hands in defeat. "Can I at least know her name?" he asked.

"Gwen Stacy."

There was a slight moment of shock when Tony dropped his fork.

"Tony?" asked Steve.

"Gwen Stacy as in top Oscorp employee?" he asked.

Peter nodded. "Yeah..."

After the Lizard incident and reconstruction in both Queens and Manhattan, Oscorp returned, only much more different and improved. They resumed their work, only no longer following Dr. Connor's studies. Gwen now worked there full time and Peter didn't really want to associate with the company anymore. He kept his distance from both the building and company.

"I've seen her work. Impressive," he bit some of his steak. "For an Oscorp employee," he added with a mumble.

_Say what?_

"Um, what?" asked Peter.

"Basically, Oscorp has been a pain in the ass for Stark Industries since they got founded," said Tony.

"I've seen that," said Pepper. "They have tried to pass as Stark employees to get files a few times in the past," she added.

"I've seen their formulas and lay outs. Not impressive," shrugged Tony.

"So in other words, Oscorp is Stark Industries main rival?" asked Steve.

"Pretty much."

Well, that took a turn. They didn't talk about Gwen. And he was glad for that. And he got some of the info on the rivalry between Oscorp and Stark Industries.

"Just being curious, but exactly how many times had they tried to pass as an Stark Industries employee?" asked Bruce.

"I think over the past seven years, it has been...around 8 times."

Clint let out a whistle. "Wow. They really don't give up," he remarked.

"So far this year, those suckers haven't tried to sneak in. But just in case, I implemented Jarvis's security system and firewall. Now whoever walks in the front doors of Stark Industries will get an automatic background check. And it's now practically impossible to hack anything here, being your laptops, phones and whatever unless I do so."

"So, Jarvis basically gave us a really good free antivirus?" asked Clint.

"Yep."

"You're welcome," said Jarvis smoothly.

That earned a small chuckle around the table.

"Oh yeah... The curfew thing," said Tony. "SHIELD doesn't want you to be in exposure of danger, yadda yadda. I'm tired of talking. Tasha?"

"They don't want you to get hurt," Natasha spoke. "SHIELD thinks you have good potential and the crime at night has gotten increasingly worse."

"Then who's out there?" asked Peter.

"Cops," said Clint after taking a small swig of water.

"Oh..."

"Which explains the curfew thing. The latest they want you to stay out it 6 PM. Because after that, it get's worse than it already is," said Natasha.

"That explains it..." said Peter.

"Sorry kid. It's Cyclops's idea," said Tony.

"No, no, it's alright. Don't worry about it," said Peter.

And so the strangely calm dinner continued.

They talked as they ate, laughing at the jokes, having a nice time. There wasn't an argument like before and it was a moment of unity between seven completely different individuals.

For once, Peter felt comfortable in the household.

It wasn't the best dinner ever, but it was going to be a nice one to remember.

Once dinner was over, they parted ways, each to their respective floor.

Peter sat at his desk as he pulled out his homework.

Something was missing...

He looked around and picked up his pen and began working on the assignment when he heard a small chuckle coming from the air vent.

"Use protection!" Clint yelled.

...

Yep, that was missing.

He sighed as he continued his Calculus assignment, knowing that the teasing was just getting started...

* * *

_A/N: There is the 2k chapter I promised! :D Gwen Stacy is now in. Why? Because I can. My headcanon is that Peter kept his distance from Oscorp after the whole Lizard thing. Because who wouldn't? And yes, on the other fics, it's going to take me a small while to update because there is going to be a full house with me since my cousins and aunts will be arriving soon. Sorry!_

_I will try my absolute best to write at least a Christmas one shot and update more fics also. I have so many AUs for other fandoms started and I need to get started on them..._

_Well, thanks for reading and happy holidays and new year!_

_Review!_

_-Esmeralda_


	7. Surprise, Surprise

**A/N: Hey guys! First update of 2013! I would have updated much sooner, like a week ago, but play rehearsals happened and I stay late at school. The play is so much fun, I like working backstage. Speaking of plays, I need to make a play themed AU. Hell, I need to write a shitload of AUs. But whatever. Lazy Esme is lazy. Anywho, I read the MCR fic Unholy verse trilogy and GAAAAAAAASP it perfect. I love love love it. I enjoyed it so much, it made me return to my RPF vocation. It's super long but I read it after every assignment during class and worked on this fic and watched horror movies and yeah. BUT OH GLOB, STARING THROUGH DEMONS IS THE BEST ONE. Pete Wentz is perfect and him being in the fic was perfect and Bexless is an amazing writer and asdfghjkl. **

**Thank you so much for faving, alerting and reviewing! It makes me so happy! :D**

**Man, this year on tumblr has been full of feels ****already! All the fandoms lost their shit lately! I mean the wholock shout out in the Christmas special of Doctor Who, Clara as the new companion, SUPERNATURAL RETURNING, Walking Dead on their way...And then there's the Sherlock fandom with a shock blanket sitting in a corner...**

**This chapter may not be my best one, but I worked really hard on it. And this is partially based off what I had to deal with in first semester. High school stuff, the typical thing. Me being a freshman officer and stuff. You'll notice what I mean in a little bit. And I made up the names as I went.**

**Some of the characters are canon, but whatever you don't recognize is just made up. And personally I had fun with this chapter. And yeah, it's a long one. All of y'all are welcome because I am staying at school till 9 for the play and who knows if I'll update over the weekend.**

**Disclaimer is still the same, enjoy!**

* * *

Surprise, Surprise

* * *

A few days later, there was an unexpected announcement in Midtown Science High School.

Peter had entered 1st period AP Government a few minutes before the warning bell rang. He would have gotten there earlier, but the subway had some troubles. Nevertheless, he made it in time.

He went to his seat and listened to the announcements over the intercom.

"Goooood mooooooooorniiiing today to everyone here at Midtown! This is Luke Cage, coming to you guys LIVE from the front office! We hope you had a wonderful weekend! If you didn't, well too bad! I don't care!"

Peter smothered his chuckle.

Even though he didn't knew him well, Luke Cage was the morning and afternoon announcer. And a funny one at that. He was sarcastic and loud, something that woke up the students in the morning.

But it still left the entire world wondering why he hasn't gotten kicked out yet of his vocation...

"I know, everyone is probably falling asleep right now... And I get that. But I don't care, because I drank four cups of coffee and I am awake! Moving on, there will be JV football practice and JV and Varsity cheerleading practice today in the football field right after school. It's gonna be a really important practice, so don't be all up in each other's pants or skirt behind the bleachers, especially you Mr. Running Back Leo Fratt and Miss Cheer Captain Lizandra Perez. We are gettin' _reaaaaal_ tired of you two making out in the hallway. And by we, I mean _everybody_."

Everyone turned around to see a blushing Lizandra in the back of the classroom. They all smothered a chuckle.

Peter silently agreed with the rest of the class. Leo and Lizandra always made out near his locker. And it got almost graphic sometimes, looking like they were about to eat each other. A very unpleasant way to start your school day.

"Leo, you're my homie and all, but hashtag, the more you know. Anywho, the Student Council will be having their meeting today in room 134 to take care of Fall fundraising. If you can't make it, please email Mr. Gill or Mrs. Ross so they can forward you the agenda as soon as possible. Marching band will have rehearsal today in the competition gym from 4-6 PM. Please get picked up by 6:30 PM. Quoting the cops and security officers, we don't wanna deal with you guys after hours. I'm talking to you, Juan Perez and Henry Moss of drumline. Chess Club has been canceled today but the meeting will be held tomorrow in room 205A. Be there or be checkmate...Get it? Cause it's chess? No?"

There was a pause.

"Man, you guys have no sense of humor. Get your lives together. ANYWAYS. And since this is Homecoming Week and we follow tradition here, for the most part, you know what this means...Hallway decorating contest!"

Yep. Hallway decorating. Midtown attempted to make school spirit apparent. They usually succeeded, a major accomplishment for any public school in Queens. Besides, it was late September, the highest peak of football season in almost every high school.

"This year, the themes is dancing through the decades! There will be the eight hallways to be judged: the main hallway, the science wing, the fine arts hall, the gyms, the Language Arts hallway, the math hall, the extracurricular hall and," Luke paused dramatically. "The dungeon."

One of the most famous halls in all of Midtown. The dungeon was one of the creepiest hallways of the school. There was always really weird noises, like thuds, bangs and scraping. It was always unnaturally cold in the hall, mostly because the heater was always busting.

People said that the reason why it was really cold was because it was haunted.

Surprise, surprise.

Of course they would think it was haunted. _Of course._

Unlike other high schools, everyone thought that was bullshit. Including most of Midtown. It may be a semi-slightly unstable public high school, but nobody has died there. Well, to their knowledge of course.

But the true reason why was because it was near the swimming pool and not too far from the gyms hall. Not to mention it was the basement floor and it was partly built underground. And Queens can be super cold sometimes, especially around Midtown. And it was logical of them, Peter believed it.

But it was still a creepy hall.

"Annnnnnnnnd here goes the tributes for the hallway games! And may the odds be ever in your favor. Especially you, ladies of Theater. Especially you. The science hall first floor: Junior and Sophomore officers! Science hall second floor: FFA and FFCLA! The Math hall: Junior and Seniors of JROTC...Bro tip, try not kill each other, we don't want a repeat of August. Do you hear me JUNIOR WEST? You don't hit a senior with a binder and not expect to get hit back! Get it right! The Fine Arts hall: theater club and advanced choir. Extracurricular hall: Seniors and Freshmen officers...Oh snap...Y'all better follow the bro tip more than the JROTC guys. Please please please don't try to kill each other. Think of the children._ The children_. The gyms hall: swimming team and lacrosse. Good luck you two! And now, the final tributes: Yearbook and Academic Decathlon..."

Peter paid more attention to the intercom. He was in Yearbook club, so he had to know.

"...Hold up... Whoa whoa whoa whoa. Plot twist to the max! You guys are going to get the dungeon hall!"

Everyone automatically looked over at Peter, him being the only Yearbook student in the class at the time.

_What?_

"Well...Good luck to all the competitors! Meeting rooms for the competitors will be announced at 3PM. Have a fantastic day, try your best in class, don't start fights or I will cut you with a plastic spoon. Luke Cage, out!"

Peter leaned down on the desk, not wanting any more looks upon him.

The intercom cut off with a flinch worthy screech.

"Well...Open your textbook to page 293 and take notes on section 3 and 4," said the teacher, seemingly unfazed with the intercom screech.

The students all followed suit, the classroom filled with silence.

Peter read the sections and took notes, but his mind was on other things.

Decorating the hallway wasn't so bad. In fact, sometimes it was fun. Mostly because they merge two completely different groups together and pure humor happens. Last year, the yearbook club had to work with the step team in the gyms hall and _boy_ was that a week to remember.

But out of all the hallways in the school...the dungeon?

_Gets stuck with the creepiest hallway of the school. Story of my life._

He didn't believe in ghosts, but he didn't exactly like the dungeon. It was a creepy hallway. He had to go down there for 3rd and 7th period everyday.

But it was going to be okay. He didn't mind being with the Academic Decathlon team. Gwen was there anyways.

Then something suddenly came to his mind.

The Avengers.

_Oh crap._

Well, they would understand.

Hopefully.

* * *

Later on that day after school, Peter took the subway and arrived home.

"Hey Tony."

"Hey Leslie Knope."

"How...Don't judge me," mumbled Peter, walking by.

Yep. Parks and Recreation. Tony was never going to let him live that down.

Tony let out a satisfied snicker.

"What are you doing up here anyways? Aren't you down in your cave or something?" asked Peter.

"Wrong billionaire, Pete. I would be down there, but I needed to get something to eat," Tony gestured to the bag of chips he was holding.

"Oh yeah, I have to talk to you about something..."

"Which is..."

"I need to stay late after school for the rest of the week. From 4 to 8-ish."

Tony let out a whistle. "Damn, kid. What did you do? Blow up the Principal's office?"

Peter rolled his eyes. Of course he would think he was in trouble. _Of course_. "Actually, it's for homecoming week."

"Ohhh, gotcha, gotcha. Well... You're going to have to have somebody stay with you over there. Cyclops's idea."

_Oh right._

"Well, who?"

"One of us. Tasha, Capsicle, me, Hawkass, Bruce, I don't know. I'll ask at dinner."

"Oh, okay."

"Right. Your aunt called. Said something for you to drop by tomorrow or so."

"I'll call her in a little bit."

"Good, good...How was school today?"

Peter was surprised. Tony never asked Peter how his day was. Usually it was Pepper or Steve.

"It was good," Peter replied, still surprised.

"That's nice to hear," Tony crumbled the bag of chips and tossed it into the trash can. "See you at dinner."

By the time Peter could reply, the billionaire was in the elevator and heading down to the lab.

* * *

"Aunt?"

"About time you answered!"

Peter smiled. He missed hearing his aunt's voice. "Hey."

"I was about to go down there and get you myself, was your phone off?" she asked.

"Yeah, sorry. School rules. I think I forgot to turn it on when I was on the subway..."

"No worries sweetie. How was school?"

"It was good," Peter walked around idly. He was in his room and had time to kill. "How's life?"

"The same. How are your super housemates treating you?" asked his aunt.

"Surprisingly, good. They're cool."

"Wait...You're still taking the subway? I thought Tony Stark had someone to take you to school."

"I don't want to push them, it's okay."

"Are you sure?"

"Besides, I can't drive to save my life. It's okay."

"Okay...Have you been out lately?"

Peter frowned. "Huh?"

"Wait, let me rephrase that...Have you been out at night, as Spider-Man?"

"Oh! No, no I haven't..."

And it was the truth. He had gone a month without putting on the suit and he was getting a little bit antsy. It was still there, in his closet. It probably collected dust, but it was nothing a quick clean wouldn't deal.

Like he was told, he had to put up his suit for a little bit. He didn't know how long it would last. He considered breaking the rules, just to go out and do a little bit of crime busting a few times, but he couldn't risk it. They were direct orders from Nick Fury. And like Tony said "His secrets have secrets and those secrets have more."

"Well...Okay..." his aunt didn't sound convinced.

"I have a curfew."

"Oh!" she exclaimed. "And when you thought SHIELD didn't get enough control of your life..." she added with a scoff.

"It's not that bad. Just be at the tower by 7. And it's getting darker earlier now."

"Well, that's understandable. But SHIELD has two agents outside and where I work. I don't like it," she replied.

"It's for protection. There are some crazy people out there."

"Fine...And how's Gwen?" she asked, changing the subject.

"She's doing well..."

"Mr. Parker, dinner is served," announced the AI.

"Thanks Jarv."

"Who was that?" asked his aunt.

"The British AI Jarvis."

"...What?"

"Yeah, I'll explain later. Gotta go," Peter began turning off the light. "Dinner is served."

"Alright...Bye Peter, take care."

"Same to you. Love you."

"Love you too."

They hung up as they both went to their separate destinations in different parts of New York.

* * *

"So Peter, how was school?" asked Pepper.

"It was good."

"This tastes amazing. Great job Pepper," said Clint taking a bite of the steak.

Pepper smiled. "I didn't make it tonight." she replied.

It was silent around the table as all eyes landed on Steve.

"What?" he asked when he saw all the gazes on him. "What happened?"

"Did you cook this?" asked Tony.

"Why does everyone assume it was me?!"

"Whoa there Cap. It's just a question," said the billionaire, raising his hands in defeat.

Bruce chuckled behind his glass of water.

"I cooked it."

Everyone turned around to Natasha.

"You cook?!" asked Tony, surprised.

"Yeah."

"Wow...That's unexpected," he said, still a bit perplexed.

"Tell me about it," mumbled Clint.

Natasha rolled her eyes.

"Well, in that case, this tastes wonderful, Natasha" said Bruce.

"Thank you Bruce," replied Natasha politely. "At least he's polite," she mumbled under her breath, loud enough for Clint and Tony to hear.

"Hey, I was very surprised," argued Clint. "Like that one time in-"

"Budapest. I called it," said Tony.

"Changing the subject," said Pepper, elbowing Tony.

"Ow! Ow! That actually hurts! Fine. We'll change the subject. You guys are no fun. Anyways, Peter is going to be staying late at school and Eyepatch still wants someone to watch over him. Who volunteers as tribute?"

"Did you blow something up?" asked Natasha, mildly suspicious. "I know you were into Science but blowing something up isn't going to help you out in anything.

Peter resisted the urge to roll his eyes. "It's not detention. It's for homecoming week."

"Ah! Homecoming! That was always fun," smirked Tony.

"What are you going to do?" asked Pepper.

"Decorate the dungeon."

Everyone shot Peter a confused look.

"Basement hall."

"Ohhh okay okay," everyone let out sounds of understanding.

"It's partially built underground and it's a cold hallway."

"Well, I won't be able to do it," said Bruce. "High school kids." he looked over at Peter. "No offense."

"None taken."

"I won't be able to do it either."

"Same here."

"I'm not even an Avenger."

"I'll do it."

Everyone turned to Clint who was halfway done with his steak.

"What?" asked Tony, surprised.

"I have nothing planned. It's not biggie. I can sneak through the vents," he replied.

"What?"

"Out of all the people..."

Peter looked around the table confused. Everyone started talking at once, the voices overlapping all with different arguments and statements like it was debate class.

After two minutes of solid arguing, Peter decided to stop them.

"Wait, wait wait wait! Can someone clarify?" asked Peter, confused.

Clint smirked. "I'm going to high school with you, Webhead."

_Oh boy._

* * *

**A/N: Annnnnnnd that's all. Man, I had so much fun writing Luke's part. I wish we had a sassy announcer at my school. Fun fact: the whole binder senior thing happened to my friend, except it was a camera bag. Ouch. Okay, so here are some of the abbreviations used. **

**JV: Junior Varsity**

**V: Varsity**

**JROTC: Junior Reserve Officer's Training Corps. Army based class in a lot of high schools.**

**FFCLA: hospitality style competitive teams**

**FFA: Future Farmers of America. Agricultural group.**

**I'm a Freshman officer and we had to decorate a hall back in September/October-ish for Homecoming week. We did it 60's style and we had most of it decorated with Beatles album covers. It was AWESOME! We won best theme. Woo!**

**Anywho, I apologize for the super long A/N but I am just so happy with how the play went. Tomorrow is closing night and the crowd was perfect! It's gonna be fun.~ I'm an usher but I do a little bit of everything backstage. Our play is Rumors and it's fantastic.**

**Weeeeeeelll, thank you for reading you wonderful people. You know what would make lil Esme [me] happy? **

**By leaving a review. **

**Thanks! **

**-Esmeralda**


	8. The Hawk in the Vents

**A/N: Wow...Has it really been three months? -sweatdrop- Ehehehe, hey guys! I apologize for the whole 'enters to class three months late with Starbucks' update. But at least I didn't pull a Pete Wentz and arrived four years late. I am so so so happy Fall Out Boy is back. I have been jamming out to their new album for the past hour. Fucking perfect. Pete, Patrick, Andrew, Joe, you are all amazing humans.**

**Everything has been crazy over the past few months in both fiction and real life. High school got gooooood! All thanks to certain things and...people. Or a certain person...Great, now I'm grinning and blushing like a Japanese anime schoolgirl. Welp.**

**Anyways, guess who is in a theatre production once again? This girl! Except that instead of working behind the scenes like I've been doing for the past three productions, I'm onstage. I am now Margot in The Diary of Anne Frank. Woo!**

**But yeah! I'm back with a 1k+ chapter! How's that for a comeback? This one has references all around, not too many, but they're definitely in here. It's also a bit deep, not sure how much, but it's deep.**

**Disclaimer is obviously still the same. Enjoy~**

* * *

The Hawk in the Vents

* * *

The next day, Peter was definitely rethinking his life choices.

_I can't believe I'm actually doing this._

Somehow, Clint had snuck into the air vents during 2nd period.

And was lost.

At first, Peter thought it was a joke. Clint was an agent of SHIELD. He was an assassin. He had gone to secret missions in countries Peter didn't even know existed. He helped kicked Loki's ass. He does car commercials in- [1]

…...Okay, maybe not the last part, but who knew? Maybe that's what happened in Budapest. You seriously don't know what exactly goes on in an agent's life, especially Clint.

Ironically, in all seriousness, one of the top agents of SHIELD was lost.

In a school air duct system.

What is this life I have to live?

Peter had forgotten to turn his phone off in the morning, like he did before 1st period. But he noticed the familiar envelope icon on the screen.

Hey Webhead...Can you throw a map up here or something?

Peter slid his phone under the back cover of his English text book. He could feel the teacher's gaze on him, so he casually wrote something on his notebook, just to throw Mr. Griffin off. [2]

He thought about it. Should he go in the lobby and pick up a map? Maybe a bag of Goldfish from the vending machines too. Maybe even a Dr. Pepper. During lunch, he could just toss it up to Clint, wherever the hell he was, just so he wouldn't starve.

Lunch was after third period, so that left him with approximately 45 minutes.

45 minutes wasn't much. Clint could wait. Classes came first, for the moment. Not to mention the English teacher can be really scary sometimes. Besides, it was only 45 minutes. Clint had to have some patience somehow. According to SHIELD, he was a former sniper, so he had to be used to waiting for a target. Sometimes, even on rooftops or snow covered trees in the woods of Switzerland...

...Not that Peter hacked into Tony's files one night and decided take a look. No, he just wouldn't do that. Invasion of privacy was not in his zone. He wasn't raised that way. Definitely not...

Okay, he looked. It was hard though. Tony wasn't kidding when he said he made everything in the tower unhackable. It took him about three long hours and a lot of coding to at least get a small briefing of the Avengers' backgrounds.

And guess who was the first one in the confidential files of SHIELD? The Hawk himself.

Even though he got a glimpse of the former paid assassin's background, he knew not to mess with him.

And that even SHIELD doesn't know what happened in Budapest.

"Mr. Parker, how is Hamlet?" asked the English teacher.

"It's good, Mr. Griffin."

Clint could handle the wait. After all, it was only 45 minutes.

* * *

Meanwhile...

* * *

Clint was so not handling the wait.

"C'mon Webhead, I don't have all day..." mumbled Clint.

He was in a rather uncomfortable position. Who knew the vents could be so cramped in schools?

"Damn high school vents..." he mumbled.

He has been in many air vent systems before. Some missions required to get inside the building and as cliche as it sounds, air vents were the way for Clint.

But in his entire career as Hawkeye, never has he been in air vents this tight.

_Fuck...Next time, Tony is so watching over Webhead._

Maybe if he went to the vent to the right, he could at least drop by a vending machine...

Oh wait, he can't.

Because he's stuck.

In the middle of nowhere! [3]

Okay, not exactly nowhere, but in the middle of an air vent system, which in a way is the middle of nowhere.

With much effort in a cramped vent, he turned around to face the right vent.

Now to find out where he was...

It was cold. Very cold. Not only was he regretting his decision, but he was also regretting not bringing a jacket. Who knew public schools could be this cold?

He crawled and looked down at the vent.

Books.

Well, at least he knew where he was...

And he was still hungry.

* * *

Finally, Lunch came around.

Peter had to tell Gwen. He sat with her in lunch and he needed back up.

Besides, maybe she had a plan on how to find Clint.

"Gwen, I have to tell you something."

"What do you want to tell me?" asked Gwen after they had the door shut.

"Uh, Hawkeye is in the air vents."

"Wait, what?!"

"Shhhh!" Peter silenced her, making sure no one was watching. "Yes, I'm being honest. And he's lost!"

Gwen nodded, still trying to believe what she just heard. "Hawkeye. Hawkeye, the same guy who helped save the world from an alien army is lost in a school air duct system," she said, almost to herself. Then she laughed, half shocked, half amused. "Peter, I don't know what to do with you anymore," she said with complete sincerity.

"I don't even know what's going on in my life anymore," Peter shrugged.

"I don't know where he is."

"We have about twenty minutes left of lunch. How exactly can we track down someone in an air vent?" asked Gwen.

"I can try texting him, even though the reception here is crap."

They began walking down the conjoined bridge hall that united the science wing and english wing.

Walking down that hall still gave him the jitters. Sure, it has been two years ago, but the Lizard's attack was still fresh on his mind. It took awhile for the hall to be rebuilt, along with most of the English hall...and Queens. And Manhattan. And the sewage system.

It all felt very recent, him becoming Spider-Man. Sometimes it felt like it happened yesterday, instead of two years ago.

"Hey," Gwen poked Peter's arm. "You okay?"

Peter returned to reality. "Yeah, I'm fine."

"You sure?"

"Yeah..."

"Are you still thinking about what happened two years ago?" asked Gwen.

Peter busied himself by texting Clint. "...A little bit..."

"Hey, the Lizard's gone. Nothing to worry about," Gwen reassured Peter. She leaned her head onto his arm. "You'll be fine...And if anything does happen, there is an Avenger in the air vents...somewhere."

Peter smiled a little bit. "True...Thanks Gwen."

"No problem, Peter."

He squeezed her hand and hit send.

"Now...where can Clint be?"

A small vibration came from Peter's pocket.

About fucking TIME you replied Webhead.

Webhead. Another one of Clint's nicknames.

Like Tony, Clint had a knack for giving people nicknames. Tony's nickname was Buckethead. Steve's nickname was Stripes, but he didn't say it to the Captain's face, unlike Tony. Natasha's was Tasha or Nat. Bruce's was Bill Nye. Why? No one knew. He hasn't given Thor a nickname yet, to Peter's knowledge.

Giving up on the text, Peter went ahead and dialed Clint.

"Where are you?"

"Okay...It's cold and there's a lot of computers here...Wait...I'm in the library."

Library. That wasn't far from where they were.

"Okay, here's the plan; we can get you out, but we need to turn off the security cameras."

"They have blind spots. I can sneak by."

"So...The library?"

"Yes, Webhead. The library."

"On my way."

* * *

**A/N: Not my best, but I tried. This was a bit deep in context. A whole lot different from the original draft I had. It was much more aloof and cracky. This one though was more thoughts and stuff. And yes, I left it as a cliffhanger because I can.**

**Oh yeah, reference index!**

**1=Mean Girls**

**2=To Kill Mr. Griffin, great read**

**3=Doctor Who**

**Well, thank you for reading and thank you for waiting! Review!**

**-Esmeralda**


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